This may actually be the last post I do about my time as a hospital Chaplain. This last Sunday night when I was at the hospital I was contacted by a nurse from my floor that a patient wasn't doing well and would probably die that night.
The story was really sad. It was a 52 year old man who was a tree cutting specialist who had gotten electrocuted when he was trimming a tree. His family had been with him for 3 weeks in the hospital but they had decided to withdraw care because the doctors had said that he would not recover. They had left earlier in the day.
I told the nurse that I believed no one should die alone and that they needed to call me when he was close.
I got a call at 9pm that night. The told me to come up. I met two nurses in the room. They told me it was very close. One nurse grabbed my hand and asked me to pray. We did that and then he handed me a stethoscope and told me to put it on and listen to the heart beat.
I literally listened to the heartbeat stop.
The two nurses told me they were going to leave and I told them I would stay for a while. I sat in a chair next to the patient and just talked to him. This is the first time I've ever really been just alone with a dead body. I sat and looked at him and just knew that "he" was no longer there. But, still I talked to him. I told him I was sorry his family wasn't there. I told him that I was glad to be with him and I got up and read to him all the cards that were in his room. I felt like it was my moment to care for him.
I sat for 20 minutes talking to him.
If you would have asked me 4 months ago if I would have ever been comfortable doing that I would have said no. Entering into this chaplaincy thing I had almost zero hospital experience. In my own life I'd never experienced death. This was one of the greatest things I could have done for me as a pastor. I'm glad my denomination requires it.
My time at the hospital has changed me. I'm a much different Pastor now. I don't have it all figured out or even close to it but I do know that I'm comfortable saying that I believe no one should die alone.
Wow, Lars. Incredible story! I have no words…tears. I was with both my grandparents at their very last…surreal experience. You are being used by God in incredible ways. Thanks for sharing.
Andrea
Great story. Loved reading it. Glad it changed you and excited to continue working along with you.
Andrea- thank you. I love knowing that someone who knew me years ago is able to see what God has done with me. Its a great testimony to his incredible grace that I get to do do what i do.
Austin- You are an answer to prayer. Im looking forward to being in the office more regular and having a ton of couch conversations with you. I love that we get to do youth ministry together.
During “Zivildienst”, some kind of social service young men serve here in Germany, I made a similar experience. I worked at a palliative care unit in a local hospital and I can still remember clearly that one sunday:
There was a patient – it was even clear for us untrained staff and the trainees – that he would die this or the next day. He got his own room a couple of days ago and since during his long stay noone ever showed up to visit him – he had no familiy, no friends – he would have been alone when he died.
I was told to look after him, tidy up the room etc. When I entered the room I could tell his time had come so I naturely took his hand and just stroked it gently. It was only in a matter of minutes that his condition worsened and I could feel his pulse getting slower and slower until it finally stopped.
I felt that in this way he didn’t have to die alone. Anyways, I believe this experience changed me. I can still remember every detail.
Now, a couple of years later I am a medical student and, as matters stand, I’ll one day become an oncologist.
Matthias- Thank you for your response. It helps me to know Im not alone. this has been a tough week at the Hospital but a good one too. I am hoping that I stay changed and that this experience always shapes me.
It is a privilege to be allowed to share sacred moments like ushering someone into the kingdom. I spent almost 3 years in hospital chaplaincy, and miss the work. Blessings on your ministry!
Everyone dies alone