I started out this week with another Monday of Hospital Chaplaincy where I basically have my brain and emotions poked and prodded by an amazing CPE team and supervisors. Then on Tuesday I had a good cry at the hospital as I was feeling really overwhelmed but then realized that I was putting too much pressure on myself and actually I was comparing myself against a false reality of what I thought other chaplains were doing.
The last two days I've had a consultant here named Mark Riddle who is meeting with my full-time team and helping us figure out ourselves and then how we can best work together.
I'm also working on all my PCUSA candidate paperwork.
All of this is hard and my brain hurts.
It's been a long time since I felt overwhelmed by this much stuff. Last time I was in a cabin in east Texas trying to get my dissertation into a submittable form and ultimately realizing I needed to take an extra semester to work on it.
I'm going to make it though. I have some good copping mechanisms. (that means I'm going to sleep a lot and just try to make it thorough every day)
I have 45 days left as a chaplain and doing two jobs. I love what I'm learning but I'm looking forward to this chapter in life being closed.
How's your day? :)
All I have to say is you are living the life. Congratulations, sir. You are making a difference. Trust yourself. And rock on!